This is the truth, nothing but the truth, and the whole truth, with a waterboard as my witness!

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Car Vandalized!

My car has been vandalized! I park where I can find a parking space and my car has been in the same place for months now, and when I walked to church noticed that three of my tires were missing! The thieves only left the boot wheel lock device and the one tire, the tickets on the window, and a plastic milk carton container where one of my tires used to be. I called the police when I got to Church and they said: "You are an old lady, and not going anywhere now, we will stop by and ticket the vehicle for a vehicle safety inspection violation, and leave a red ticket on it as it is now an abandoned vehicle. You are an old lady, with no hope and no friends, and the crackheads did society a favor by preventing you from driving." I put down the phone in tears and said to the pastor, "what am I to do?" He said, "why ask me? I have asked you to remove that car from in front of the Church for weeks! You are an old lady, without hope, and with no friends, it is probably best that your car gets towed as soon as possible, God bless you child." And then finished cleaning his hands with green soap, used a nail file to remove some grease from beneath his fingernails, and then wiped his hands on a clean white towel leaving it black as tar, and left me standing in his office

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